I've got a question for a long time:
Usually, I want to share my experience with my families, friends, and strangers after I have been through a fun or hard period that they have never experienced before. However, I am always thinking that will they be curious about it? Or they just feel indifferent? I guess the answer is “It depends.” Technically, this is a very complicated question, because others’ behaviors will depend on factors such as relationship, relevance, and free time. Therefore…put it in a simple way, the solution is that "say what you want to tell and see how others react." In fact, this is how we communicate naturally! Maybe it is just because I am kind of sensitive to others feeling making this “problem” a problem.
Ok, that is not the question.
Here comes the question.
How about, we all have gone through a period of struggling? I succeeded, but some of the people I know (may not know) failed. At that moment, should I come to them and say, “Hey, I will help you!” Or, should I wait and let them figure out by themselves? Or, should I just continue my journey without giving any help? Maybe someone else will offer more useful help!
If that is too abstract, let’s think the problem in a real scenario,
Ivy wants to write a book about her life generally in S University. She believes her experience will help some students know more about her school. However, she is afraid that someone else would do a better job than she does. Ivy is hesitating…continue? Or shoot down the idea? She is absolutely confident about her ability to do a good job, but the uncertainty of possibilities makes her anxious.
Ok, go back to our discussion, though I am the only person discussing, lol.
I guess the answer is, I should be more confident and provide an extra option for others. In this way, other people will make the choice, not me.
But, I am not too sure about my answer. How could I be more confirmed about this answer?
Today, I met Alexandra. She used her experience explaining the answer in a deeper way. She was from a poor family and her parents never went to college. One day, her mom rushed to her and told her that she heard something about college, like, Ivy League, and Dartmouth. Without having any knowledge about Dartmouth. Alexandra’s mom seriously told her, “Dartmouth, you must go there.” Fortunately, Alexandra worked hard and got the admission letter! However, after the big change in her life, she started feeling frustrated and unsecure. Before the college, she thought she was prepared, but the cruel fact showed that she was not ready yet. She got F for her course and her families could not provide any help either. She was disappointed and confused about her future. She left school finally.
However, she didn’t stop thinking about the problem. After a year, she went back to school and got good grades! You may wonder, what happened in this year? I don’t know the answer, but it seems like she picked up her confidence and seriously dealt with the unexpected college experience. After Dartmouth, holding a strong belief and specific goal that is to help the students who may suffer the same problem, she went to S University and studied Education. After she got her master degree, she talked to many educators about dropouts’ situation and found out there was actually nobody helping with this type of group of people.
So, she started her business (may be NGO), which is helping students get ready for college life academically and psychologically, especially for students whose parents with limited education background.
What I am impressed about this story is that, she transferred her own experience to real actions and make changes for others’ lives!
Now I feel like, the answer is super easy. Just do it, AND it will be helpful. I know that there must be someone who can do a better job than I do, but the thing is, no single person can save the world, and there are many superheroes as well! Lol! The world is diverse. We love all useful stuff (sometimes love junks too!)
Never let overthinking kills the willingness to make a change. Share experience, and provide help. This is my first step.