I've got a question
for a long time:
Usually, I want to
share my experience with my families, friends, and strangers after I have been
through a fun or hard period that they have never experienced before. However,
I am always thinking that will they be curious about it? Or they just feel
indifferent? I guess the answer is “It depends.” Technically, this is a very
complicated question, because others’ behaviors will depend on factors such as
relationship, relevance, and free time. Therefore…put it in a simple way, the solution is that "say what you want to tell and see how others react." In fact, this is how we communicate
naturally! Maybe it is just because I am kind of sensitive to others feeling
making this “problem” a problem.
Ok, that is not the
Here comes the
How about, we all
have gone through a period of struggling? I succeeded, but some of the people I
know (may not know) failed. At that moment, should I come to them and say, “Hey,
I will help you!” Or, should I wait and let them figure out by themselves? Or,
should I just continue my journey without giving any help? Maybe someone else
will offer more useful help!
If that is too
abstract, let’s think the problem in a real scenario,
Ivy wants to write a
book about her life generally in S University. She
believes her experience will help some students know more about her school. However, she is afraid that someone else would do a better job
than she does. Ivy is hesitating…continue? Or shoot down the idea? She is
absolutely confident about her ability to do a good job, but the uncertainty of
possibilities makes her anxious.
Ok, go back to our
discussion, though I am the only person discussing, lol.
I guess the answer
is, I should be more confident and provide an extra option for others. In this
way, other people will make the choice, not me.
But, I am not too sure about my answer. How could I be more confirmed about this answer?
Today, I met
Alexandra. She used her experience explaining the answer in a deeper way. She was
from a poor family and her parents never went to college. One day, her mom
rushed to her and told her that she heard something about college, like, Ivy
League, and Dartmouth. Without having any knowledge about Dartmouth.
Alexandra’s mom seriously told her, “Dartmouth, you must go there.” Fortunately,
Alexandra worked hard and got the admission letter! However, after the big
change in her life, she started feeling frustrated and unsecure. Before the
college, she thought she was prepared, but the cruel fact showed that she was
not ready yet. She got F for her course and her families could not provide any help
either. She was disappointed and confused about her future. She left school
However, she didn’t
stop thinking about the problem. After a year, she went back to school and got
good grades! You may wonder, what happened in this year? I don’t know the
answer, but it seems like she picked up her confidence and seriously dealt with
the unexpected college experience. After Dartmouth, holding a strong
belief and specific goal that is to help the students who may suffer the same
problem, she went to S University and studied Education. After she got her
master degree, she talked to many educators about dropouts’ situation and found
out there was actually nobody helping with this type of group of people.
So, she started her
business (may be NGO), which is helping students get ready for college life
academically and psychologically, especially for students whose parents with limited education background.
What I am impressed
about this story is that, she transferred her own experience to real actions and make changes for others’ lives!
Now I feel like, the
answer is super easy. Just do it, AND it will be helpful. I know that there
must be someone who can do a better job than I do, but the thing is, no single
person can save the world, and there are many superheroes as well! Lol! The
world is diverse. We love all useful stuff (sometimes love junks too!)
overthinking kills the willingness to make a change. Share experience, and provide
help. This is my first step.